Luxury Vendeuil Escape: Spacious City Center Flat in La Rosiere!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we're about to dive headfirst into the (potentially glorious) mess that is the Luxury Vendeuil Escape: Spacious City Center Flat in La Rosiere! I'm not just reviewing it, I'm living it, in my head, right now. SEO be damned, let's get real.
First off, the basics, the stuff every hotel has to tick off, or you're basically sleeping in a glorified porta-potty. Let's rip through the Cleanliness and Safety section, because in this post-pandemic world, if you haven't nailed this, you're done.
- Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food, Physical distancing, Professional-grade sanitizing, Rooms sanitized, Safe dining: Yeah, yeah, good. Glad to hear it. Look, I'm a germaphobe, but I also have a life. So, if you can't hit the basics, you're toast.
- Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Hand sanitizer, Hot water linen washing, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment: OKAY, this is comprehensive. I'm starting to feel a little better. I'm already picturing the staff, not just cleaning, but eviscerating any lingering dust bunnies. Good, good. Now, about that room sanitization opt-out… interesting. Does this mean they trust me to NOT sneeze on everything? I like that.
Now, on to the delicious bits - well, hopefully delicious: Dining, Drinking, and Snacking. This is where a hotel can really soar (or crash and burn like a soufflé in a hurricane).
A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant: Holy moly, that's a lot of food options! A la carte, buffet, Asian, Western, cocktails by the pool? My stomach is doing little happy flips already. Let's hope the reality lives up to the promise. I have a soft spot for a good soup in a restaurant.
I am totally picturing a massive breakfast buffet. And a poolside bar. And maybe a little international cuisine… is there a sushi chef? Asking for a friend (me). I am getting VERY excited about the possibility of a delicious brunch.
Let's talk Accessibility, baby:
- Accessibility, Elevator, Facilities for disabled guests: Excellent. Good for you, Vendeuil Escape. Making everyone feel welcome is a HUGE plus.
Things to do, ways to relax. (Ooooh, my Favorite)
- Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]: Oh. My. God. This is where things get interesting. A pool with a view? A SPA? I almost forgot the apartment part and just want to live in the spa! Forget work, I am moving in and never coming out. But wait, can I book a body scrub and a body wrap? A foot bath to loosen up the toes, the gym afterward and sauna and steamroom. Oh, and the pool. Did I mention the pool? Because, pool with a view. You KNOW you're not even thinking about work at that point.
Here's where it gets interesting: the Room Itself.
- Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens: Okay, okay, deep breath. A LOT of options in the rooms.
- My first reaction always is: Air conditioning? Awesome. Blackout curtains? Crucial, especially if you plan on sleeping in after a long day of relaxing. Coffee/tea maker and complimentary tea? Bless. Free bottled water? Yes, please! (I've had one too many hotel experiences where the water was mysteriously extra, which is just rude.)
- I'm also loving the idea of bathrobes and slippers. Because who doesn't want to waltz around feeling like a glamorous, slightly-hungover movie star?
- "Extra-long bed" - YES! I am six feet tall, and short beds are my personal hell.
- "Window that opens." YES! Fresh air! I hate being stuck indoors.
- Internet access – wireless? Excellent. I need to Instagram my relaxing.
More random thoughts (and a lot of questions) because this is getting REAL:
- "Laptop workspace." Good for me, bad for my actual work. Probably a trap.
- "Non-smoking." Good. (Unless there's a smoking area with a view, in which case… hmm.)
- "Interconnecting room(s) available." Useful! But only if I have enough friends to fill the other rooms. Probably a solo adventure.
- "Bathroom phone." Does anyone actually use these? Are they in every single room?
Okay, let's look at the practical stuff - Services and Conveniences:
- Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center: The standard things! I always check for these. Contactless check-in is a NICE touch. The concierge… I'm a sucker for a good concierge. They can make or break a vacation with their local knowledge.
For the Kids
- Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: Alright! It looks great if you're traveling with kids..
Getting Around:
- Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking: This is great to see. A bonus to seeing "Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site]" - I like that.
The Real Deal, My Honest (and Slightly Biased) Opinion
Look, based on the description alone, the Luxury Vendeuil Escape sounds pretty darn fantastic. But… I'm a skeptic. The devil is always in the details. It's one thing to say you have a pool with a view, and quite another to actually have one.
So here is my offer (and a challenge):
Book your escape now and get a 10% discount. Don't wait! We're talking pool with a view, a spa, delicious food, and enough amenities to keep you pampered for days. I'm not going to guarantee world peace, but I am promising a seriously relaxing break.
My challenge to YOU: Book the Luxury Vendeuil Escape. And then tell me if it lives up to the hype. Because if it does, I'm booking myself a room.
One Last Tangent.
I am now picturing myself in that hotel, right after a body wrap, drinking a cocktail by the pool with a view, feeling my best self. Yeah. I am officially sold.
Amman's Most Luxurious Suite: Boulevard Views Await!
La Rosiere & Me: A Gloriously Imperfect Itinerary (or, "How I Almost Died on a Chairlift and Learned to Love the Smell of Cheese")
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, 'cause this ain't your average, perfectly-curated travel guide. This is me, raw and unfiltered, trying to survive (and maybe even enjoy) a week in La Rosiere, France. We're talking spacious flat in the city center – sounds fancy, right? We'll see. Expect meltdowns, moments of sheer bliss, and a whole lotta cheese. Let's dive in:
Day 1: Arrival & Mild Panic (aka "Where's the Luggage?!")
- Morning (8:00 AM): Arrive at Geneva airport. The air is crisp, and the Alps are stunning. Seriously, breath-taking. For like, five minutes. Then I remember I'm supposed to navigate a rental car and suddenly the stunning view turns into a blurry, anxiety-induced haze.
- Late Morning (11:00 AM): Car rental debacle complete! The French road signs… they're like a puzzle designed by a sadist. Somehow, miraculously, I emerge and begin the scenic drive to La Rosiere.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM): Arrive in La Rosiere. The "spacious flat" is… well, it has space. And it is in the city center. It also smells faintly of… I don't know, old ski boots and hope? Okay, maybe I'm being harsh. Unpack. Or try to. Where in the world is my luggage?! (Turns out it's in Geneva. Joy.)
- Evening (6:00 PM): Desperation mode. Scrounging for something to wear. Found a questionable t-shirt in my day bag and jeans that have seen better days. Wander into the village square. Discover a charming little bakery. Buy a croissant. Eat it. It's the best thing that's happened all day.
- Night (8:00 PM): Dinner at La Ferme. They serve… wait for it… cheese fondue. And I almost died of happiness. Seriously. Melty, gooey, cheesy heaven. I devoured an entire pot. I swear, I think I almost cried. This evening was perfect.
Day 2: Slopes of Terror & the Unexpected Joy of a Ski Boot
- Morning (8:00 AM): Luggage still MIA. Sigh. Rental gear time! Putting on ski boots is a deeply humiliating experience. Feeling like a penguin trying to walk on hot coals. The skis, however, are cool.
- Late Morning (10:00 AM): The chairlift. Oh, the chairlift. I have a slight fear of heights. Turns out "slight" is a gross understatement. I white-knuckle the bar, silently screaming on the ascent. The view? Gorgeous. My expression? A grimace of pure, unadulterated terror.
- Afternoon (12:00 PM): Attempt to ski. I'm told I look like a newborn giraffe. Falling. Again. And again. And again. I feel like a danger to myself and everyone around me.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM): Decide to take a break and drink hot chocolate at the top of the mountain. It's a sugary, chocolatey hug in a mug. And the sun… chef's kiss. The world is so beautiful when you're not about to fall on your face.
- Late Afternoon (4:00 PM): Decide to attempt a gentle blue slope. Manage to stay upright for about 10 seconds. Crash gloriously. Embrace the snow. It surprisingly soft.
- Evening (7:00 PM): The ski boots. They're slowly becoming my friends. Back at the flat, I'm exhausted but in a good way. I find a bottle of wine in the cupboard and drink it while watching the sunset over the mountains from the flat. It’s breathtakingly beautiful. Even the imperfect parts of this day are good.
Day 3: The Cheesy Repeat & a (Very) Short-Lived Romance
- Morning (9:00 AM): Luggage update: still lost. Wondering if it's in Narnia. Decided to go shopping. Pick up some essentials – socks, underpants, more croissants.
- Late Morning (11:00 AM): Back on the slopes, but this time, I stick to the bunny hill. Baby steps. And it's… fun! I'm beginning to understand why people love skiing.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): Lunch at a little cafe on the slope. Meet a charming Frenchman. He offers me a croissant and tells me my French is "adorable".
- Afternoon (2:00PM): He suggests skiing together. I’m in. He's pretty good at skiing. I'm not.
- Late Afternoon (4:00 PM): He offers to teach me! I can’t understand half of what he's saying, but it doesn't matter.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Dinner at La Ferme… again. Hey, don't judge! I need that fondue. And the Frenchman… he joins me! Romance in the Alps? Maybe, probably not.
- Night (8:00 PM): A perfect evening. We talk, and laugh, he’s a good guy. However, my luggage has still not arrived. Talk about a buzzkill.
Day 4: The Descent into Cheese-Induced Bliss (and the Rise of the Glutes!)
- Morning (8:00 AM): The Frenchman has gone. Maybe it was the luggage thing, who knows? Today, I swear I'm going to try some ski. And I will.
- Late Morning (10:00 AM): Back on the slopes. Today I make a point to enjoy the sun.
- Afternoon (12:00 PM): Lunchtime at a nice café, which is now my favorite place to eat.
- Afternoon (3:00 PM): Muscles now on fire. The pain is real.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Dinner at… you guessed it La Ferme. Am I addicted? Maybe. Do I care? Absolutely not!
- Night (8:00 PM): After I get done eating, I watch a film and eat a bar of chocolate.
Day 5: Rest Day & a Quest for Non-Cheese Goodies
- Morning (9:00 AM): My thighs are screaming. Time for a rest day. Walk into the city.
- Late Morning (11:00 AM): Find a local market. Attempt to buy something that isn't cheese. Fail. Buy a beautiful piece of local butter.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): Wander through the village. Admire the traditional architecture. Get lost.
- Afternoon (3:00 PM): Visit the local brewery. And try the local beers, which are actually fantastic.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Home-cooked meal. Well, “home-cooked” in the sense that I try to cook something out of things I found. It's edible.
- Night (8:00 PM): Enjoy the peace and quiet of the flat.
Day 6: The Chairlift Strikes Back & a Farewell Fondue (Sniff, Sniff)
- Morning (8:00 AM): Last day of skiing! I'm a little less scared of the chairlift. A little.
- Late Morning (10:00 AM): Make it down a red slope. I'm not going to lie… I'm pretty proud of myself.
- Afternoon (12:00 PM): Final meal on the slopes.
- Afternoon (3:00 PM): Head back to the flat. Pack. Luggage still hasn't arrived. At this point, I almost don't care.
- Evening (7:00 PM): One last, glorious dinner at La Ferme. Tears. So. Much. Cheese. Emotional goodbye to the fondue.
- Night (9:00 PM): Stare at the mountains, wondering why this holiday is suddenly ending.
Day 7: Departure & Reflections (aka "I'm Coming Back!")
- Morning (8:00 AM): Drive back to Geneva. The views are still spectacular. Feeling a little sad, but mostly full of food.
- Midday (12:00 PM): Geneva airport. Turns out my luggage finally arrived. Figures.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM): Head home.
- Everyday: The memory of the Alps will live forever!
Final Thoughts:
La Rosiere was messy. It was challenging
Regency Inn Hondo: Your Texas Getaway Awaits!
Luxury Vendeuil Escape: Your Questions Answered (and My Impassioned Rants!)
Okay, so you're thinking about escaping to La Rosiere, specifically to the "Luxury Vendeuil Escape" flat. Smart choice! ...Or so I thought before *that* incident. Anyway, let's dive into your burning questions. Prepare for some honesty, folks. This isn't your average brochure copy.
1. Is it *really* in the city center? Because I've been burned before...
Alright, I get it. "City center" can mean anything from a slightly dusty corner store to a place that demands you *wear* a monocle just to feel sophisticated enough. YES, it *is* in the city center. Like, the proper, "stroll-to-the-bakery-for-croissants-in-your-pajamas" city center. And trust me, I've spent enough time wandering aimlessly in "city centers" that turned out to be glorified car parks. This one is the real deal. The only issue? Finding a parking spot is like winning the lottery... but more painful. I spent a good hour one afternoon circling, muttering under my breath, convinced I'd end up living in my car. I almost did sleep in the car because the sofa was too enticing. Just... be prepared. Worth it though. Especially for those damn croissants.
2. "Luxury" - What does that *actually* entail? I'm picturing gold-plated taps...
Okay, so no, there aren't gold-plated taps (disappointing, I know). But the "luxury" is subtle, in a good way. Think plush bedding that practically begs you to abandon all responsibilities, a fully equipped kitchen (it even had a garlic press! a proper one!), and a seriously comfy living room. The kind of space where you can actually *breathe*. And the view?! Ugh, stunning. Mountain views, of course. I actually spent a good chunk of my first afternoon just lounging on the balcony, staring at the mountains. It was glorious. Except... there were a couple of those giant, annoying, buzzing flies. Minor detail, really. But they *did* try to ruin my zen. Almost succeeded. Damn flies!
3. Is it kid-friendly? Because my offspring are basically miniature tornadoes.
Ugh. Kids. Look, I'm not a kid person, so I can't fully vouch for the "kid-friendly" aspect. But the place *seemed* pretty safe. No sharp corners I could see. The balcony *could* be a hazard if your little tornado is the adventurous sort. I would suggest always keep an eye on them. They'd love the mountains though! So maybe? Someone else will have to confirm (or deny) this one for you. I suspect it's probably better suited for slightly older kids who understand the concept of "don't touch that expensive art piece, Timothy!"
4. What about Wi-Fi? Because Instagram waits for NO ONE.
Yes, the Wi-Fi is surprisingly good. Like, "stream-Netflix-in-your-pajamas-while-eating-a-croissant-without-lag" good. Which, let's be honest, is the ultimate goal of any vacation, right? I tested it thoroughly, of course. For... research. And, yes, I got plenty of Insta-worthy shots. The pictures of the view? Pure gold. Seriously, it's the sort of Wi-Fi that makes you question your entire existence... because you realize you're spending more time online than truly *living*. But hey, the pictures were amazing! And the croissants... well, they deserved to be documented.
5. Is it *really* spacious? I've been in flats that felt like a shoebox.
It IS spacious. Like, you could actually do a yoga session *without* accidentally kicking the furniture. The living room is massive. I nearly got lost a couple of times! (Okay, maybe not, but it's definitely roomy.) You won't feel claustrophobic. You can actually *spread out*, which, let's face it, is a luxury in itself. I paced. I danced. I may have even attempted a cartwheel (bad idea). Plenty of space though, seriously. And you'll need it. Because, and I'm just saying, if the furniture is *too* nice, you might not want to touch it... But good luck keeping the kids from playing with it, if they're even allowed to go in the first place!
6. The BIG question: Would you go back?
Okay, here's the thing. Most of the time? Absolutely, yes. The view. The location. The croissants. The Wi-Fi. It's fantastic. I loved the place. But... and there's always a but, isn't there? There was *one* incident. I won't go into gory detail, but let's just say I had a run-in with a rogue pigeon, a particularly aggressive gust of wind, and a balcony chair. It involved a lot of scrambling, some very undignified noises, and an almost-loss of my beloved coffee. The memory still makes me shudder. So, would I go back? Yes. But I'm bringing a helmet and possibly a flamethrower (just in case).
7. Is it noisy? I need peace and quiet!
Generally, no. It's surprisingly quiet, considering it's smack-dab in the city center. You might hear a faint rumble of the garbage trucks in the early morning (again, that parking spot scenario), but nothing truly disruptive. I actually slept better there than I do at home. That could be the air... or the sheer exhaustion from all the croissant-eating, frankly. There was this one night, though... a group of, shall we say, *enthusiastic* tourists were celebrating something loudly until about 2 AM. Ugh. But, that’s the city life! So... Mostly quiet. Most of the time. Earplugs recommended just in case. I’m probably just a light sleeper.
